it's not the walk of shame if you do it in cowboy boots.
I'm not high anymore, I decide when it's done.
I am highly attracted to the men and that's all i can say. I do not clap and make noises but i do turn to the side and say how i'd do incredible things to them if given the chance
Just checked my phone. Sometime last night I googled sex positions in a tent. Was there even a tent there?
He graduated with honors. I've seen him kneeboard on dry ground and run a razor scooter into a wall...anyone can graduate with honors
Jello bowls to the fucking face, that or ramen spiked with liq. Those are the only options in this house.
I think I fixed my testicle. That's why I didnt pay $25 for a doctor to do it
Wow, im gonna be a great doctor..."hi let me save your life but first check out this pic of me deep throating a handle of grey goose"
Using your ex girlfriend's little brother to pick up women at the a&p: priceless
So i know i shouldnt being spending random large amnts of money...but i just bought a sword.
yes and no. im drunk but idk if im "blow marcus" drunk. call in like an hour.
Yes. We drank 3/4 of a handle of vodka, fried and ate a 3lb package of bacon, I tackled the neighbors snowman, made snow angels in our underwear, and then fucked all night. Christmas success.
Her mom came in and passed out drunk on the floor next to us while she was riding me, "it's all good, she does this all the time" is what she said
I've faked every orgasm I've ever had, I think I can fake being sick for 8 hours.
I called him the wrong name all night, yet I still got a ride home from the party and hooked up with the guy. I'm irresistible.
Randomize
