But I don't consider them one night stands. They're auditions.
I am at a striph cluv. They are ovealls everywhere. I have hot rock botto.
we've progressed from teabagging to lighting eachothers asses on fire. this cannot be a good path.
You are in charge of making sure that her vagina explodes with joy tonight.
Bookstore boy and I went out, he came back here and I tried to fool around and he respects me too much blah blah I'm a predator.
Dude, it's the frankincense and myrrh soap. Smelling like baby Jesus will get you laid.
He's grinding topless with a group of girls to that discovery channel song. May I take a message?
Some guy offered you 100 bucks last night to suck your toes. I had to drag you away while you were yelling at me, "Stop money cock blocking me!"
That's just where I'm at in my life.
I think I should start a match.com profile and put "robe lounging" as my only hobby
there was so much lube in my brother's closet...
Did you feel uncomfortable?
For a little while. Then I got really high and ate a bunch of animal crackers out of some dudes pocket while we chilled on their super comfortable couch.
Holy shit, I wanna ride him into the horizon.
masturbating on the freeway is more stressful than it sounds
what do you mean i can't make cookies with a blow dryer? challenge accepted.
I need to find a more reliable booty-call so I can start dating people and take it slow.
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