Who has a tranny cab driver? I have a tranny cab driver.
I dont get it-she has sex with me but wont be my facebook friend?
She's like the female version of the Momento guy. She keeps forgetting that I'm an asshole after we have sex.
so... thinking about masturbating finally
taking the losers way out I see
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he told me my vagina needed a tic tac
Honestly, where the fuck is osama bin laden?
I'm not a pervert.. I just like to be naked...
She somehow inhaled a tack last night, she's having surgery today.
You passed out in my bathroom last night. I put a towel over your face so I could shit without it being gay
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Why are you always at the walk in clinic, Lady Chlamydia?
You're not allowed to make that my permanent nickname.
I've already reverted to sweat pants. And lonely drinking.
On the way out the door to work grabbed the wine glass on the floor left for the ghost of Elijah and chugged it. PASSOVER.
Officially locked in my status as an indifferent millennial by downloading Tinder.
You got stoned and bought $300 worth of pudding. Again! Why do YOU think she left you?
I know I'm not a hook-up kind of chick but he is a firefighter & an EMS worker. I felt like maybe I'd be a good person if I let a good person inside of me
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