Jake died.
WTF????????? That's how you tell me????
Oops typo. Jake cried.
I have been thinking about it and I am really glad we decided to order helmets.
I'm 99% sure that for 3 hours I thought you were British. We must smoke that again.
She asked if my windows were tinted enough for road head.
Waking and baking has revolutionized how i brush my teeth. Seriously up to like 25 min everry morn. Highly recommend
shes still here... layin in my bed watching a beyonce concert on tv drinking leftover franzia straight outta the bag and crying
i think this is the gayest thing you've ever shown me. and i'm pretty sure you've sent me pictures of a dude sticking his dick in a horse's nose.
Why am I always the sober one?
Cause you're the only one with any sort of self control. It's kinda your super power...
By the taste of his semen he isnt vegetarian and therefore lied to me to take me home on a brighter note i stole his fondue set
the fact that i came three times was completely negated by the fact that he high-fived himself after.
we had a full conversation and he only brought up drugs twice. overall I'd call it a success
I just wanna inform you guys that the first pregnancy scare of 2016 is over...
Adderal can only make me focus so much. Your ass is stronger than my medicine. Congratulations.
I don't care if he's the coolest coworker, if he's living in his mom's basement at 30 you should not buy drugs from him
The cat's telling me to stop taking acid, and to start doing the lords work. I'm almost 99% sure he's talking about the dark lord.
THIS CAT'S GOING TO TURN INTO A SNAKE AND KILL ME! GET OVER HERE NOW! BRING YOUR WAND.
Randomize
