Can we switch to phone sex? This is starting to get awkward...
the sham wow guy got arrested for beating up a hooker.
i don't know what kind of porn he watches.. but that is NOT how you do it...
My number went up to seventeen today. I forgot to add my random hookup on a sailboat.
Hulk Hogan has now convinced 2 women to marry him & I have yet to have a successful or healthy relationship. I am officially depressed.
Wow, I just sneezed gum out of my nose. Wonder how long that's been up there.
I call it my summer of slut; except summer lasts from May until December. It's been incredibly successful
I don't really see how asking you not to cum on my face or hair makes me high maintenance
I know what youre going to say and vodka only explains half of my sitation
IDK DUDE BUT HE TIED IT WITH A SHOELACE SO I GOTTA FREE SHOELACE OUTTA THE DEAL. THIS GIVES A NEW MEANING TO LACED DRUGS
I don't know how or when he is sober long enough to donate plasma
Apparently I had 2 bloody noses and after my sis put me to bed at the hotel, I escaped and my sister's friend found me in an elevator with some guy
Are ropes allowed in during conjugals?
Like I wasn't going to make out with the hot Australian sitting next to me at the Portland blazer game?
You should not be involved with someone who smells like that. Because that smell seriously does not go away. Even if you can't actually smell it at any given point, it will still haunt you
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