the nicest thing hes ever said to me is give me head.......please
what was i supposed to do!? wake up and actually ask her name??
Wish I didn't live with 3 girls so I could beat off in peace.
Take this only to mean that we love you, but we're having a serious, half-hour, hypothetical discussion about how far we think we could throw you.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you spent the rest of the night making a recipe for mixed drink called "the new years bowel remover". it has 13 parts but judging from the bold all caps, the boiled avocado is the most important
So I was about the only one NOT pregaming or stoned at my aunt's funeral... Maybe thats why I'm the black sheep.
Im in my back seat in my own drive way with two beers left to shotgun and watching the sunrise. Am I over her yet?
My left boob kept making random appearances last night.
I got the job! The hiring manager is the sister of a guy I slept with so its like I'm a real adult now
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
This is seriously fucking awkward. My favorite sex scene just started and my dad's still here. He offered me Cheetos.
I didn't realize how much I relied on you for a reason to drink on tuesday
I don't trust my subconscious. It sleeps with my exboyfriend sometimes.
Just got home from work. I'm going to change into sweats for a while before I have to wear normal pants to the party like I promised.
I love you. Doing a double. Going to die. It will be painful. Let the world know i partied. God, did i party.
Think he has a gf
Yea that shit doesn’t necessarily stop me
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