do you know your status is "goal for vegas: hook up with a girl AND a boy"?
and THATS why i'm not adding my mom on facebook
This smoking ban is really fucking with my ability to fart in public
I know I said that I'd stop dating 20 year olds... but at least this one's not my student...
She's in the middle of blacking out but is singing Mariah carey songs. Hitting every note.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Had a drag queen carry me to the car. So I'm told...
he just flipped me off the bed, said "deal with it", and came on me.
I probably should have eaten more before I started shotgunning beers at 9am, but it was so much damn fun.
Reasons why I'm always right: I am older, I am wiser, I have a larger penis
IM GOING TO SIT ON YOUR FACE AND CHANT 'I BELIEVE THAT WE WILL WIN'
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I am actually offended he hasn't asked me to sleep with him yet to get better grades...I wanted the whole college experience.
I'd cum everywhere if I could have chicken nuggets right now
I'm on my way to bail our sister out of jail with our mother's credit card. How old are we??
I think I met my butt stuff soulmate
I was the only one in group sessions to bring up sex as a stress reliever. Some of those people were awfully judgy despite the fact we were all in a psych ward.
A lady played my boobs as if they were drums. It's been that kinda night.
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