Googled "can you put dry ice in your drink?" I'm safee
Peanut butter while high is kinda stressful
When he came downstairs he looked at me like I was attempting to rob his house.
Did you reintroduce yourself?
He threatened to call the cops.
It was pretty bad. Like cum-on-my-face-while-singing-Let-It-Snow bad.
Let's just say after this weekend I'm known as Shameous the Irish bar fighter.
The sad thing is; I'm getting used to walking around feeling like I could hurl at any minute.
took over 12 bombs tonight and we still aren't hooking up. Wait how am I functioning
She called to say her plane was running late and i had 30minutes to get to the airport for bathroom sex
But I REALLY want to hide my crazy for as long as possible with him so he'll date me.
Trying to stay sober at a family function but hiccuping so fucking loud. "Have you been drinking?" I hit on my cousin so yeah. I have been drinking.
I just wanted to personally thank you for throwing clementine slivers at me across the room while we made out
Slap a cop in the butt for a felony charge. Check.
he's been dating her for 18 months and cheating on her with me for 16. if that's not commitment, i don't know what is.
Would you like to get a drink then hook up or reverse order I don't really care. Hopefully you can keep this between us.
Grandpa just whipped it out and started pissing on the way to the game stuck in traffic. I saw EVERYTHING. :(
Randomize
