There is an asian family here, I heard the mom call her son onyong
oh great. the only prospects for sex left for the night are douchebag in the ed hardy shirt & frodo-looking ass
fuck it... i'll be the lord of his rings
Haha oh wow he'd be perfect. He's got everything MTV looks for in a real world cast member. Gay. Tool. From Methuen
the number of months ive had a girlfriend in my life divided by the number of blowjobs ive gotten is extremely depressing...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
one day I'm really going to regret not using the boners I got in planes and cars
She was giving me great head...... until I asked her how much this was going to cost.... she left abruptly
she kept peeing on everything and yelling it was now her property.
I tried douching with a turkey baster. Not the brightest idea.
I think your going to be the cause of an awesome death
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i want to find a way to basically assault his face with my vagina.
Standing in my kitchen eating choc chip cookie batter from the bowl. As sad as it is, I kinda like the places bad breakups take me.
So, I ran into Garrett last night in the laundry room.
Oh really? First post break-up run in. How'd it go? Awkward?
Um. We had sex on a washing machine.
Yeah but who says we can't be shitfaced and tan at the same time?
I just went to cvs and bought condoms, handcuffs and a coloring book
Drunk me wants sober me to be happy, woke up with half a dozen doughnuts in my bed this morning.
Randomize