You guys sftrill at mcdondalds?!!!!
Yes.
fuckin bring me a cheseburgeria
He was dressed in cheap leather and smelled like death.
nailed a girl as she was wearing a darth vader shirt. Cross that one off my list.
Haha so you are never gonna want to meet my mom now...she just found your thong in her front seat
The world would be so much better with thought bubbles.
If i'm not hungover, near death, and wondering what i did the night before on Monday, life is not worth living.
Legit screaming match in this bar over the differences between cupcakes and muffins.
Once he past out I measured his penis with my remote.
Woke to a half burnt 20 in my pocket, covered in mud, clothes all wet, so im assuming I didn't use that 20 you gave me for a taxi
it was like a congratulatory penis slap
God I miss you. I want to fuck your face... Then do all the girly cuddly shit too.
She told me having sex was our civic duty. How can I not love her?
Saw your dad at the bar last night... And again this morning when he left. Told you not to mess with me bitch.
How many times do I have to tell you I'm not bisexual.
.....unless there is alcohol involved
He answered the door stark naked. When I called him on it he shrugged and said 'casual Friday ' Some boys can't be trusted to work from home.
Randomize
