THEY ARE MY AGE. THEY ARE YOUR LITTLE SISTER'S AGE THIS IS A DELICATE MATTER. CAPS LOCK
Come to me. Jacob is confessing his love and all I want is a hot dog. With chili. Not love.
I NEED TO GET TO THE PLAYGROUND. I JUST NEED TO SWING. IF I SWING MAYBE THE SMELL WILL COME OFF OF ME. I NEED TO SWING
I was basically shocked at how calmly you accepted my violently shoving a french fry in your mouth.
I'm in the middle no shirt white shorts humping the white dustbuster next to the guy shooting off the tazer infront of the two guys humping on the bicycle
Omg this is like trying to sleep on a pile of ballsacks.
there are no losers in shot checkers. only winners.
you're the third guy in less than 24 hours she fucked. I'm glad you lost your virginity just don't act like you climbed Mt. Everest.
It was one of those "how did I get to my bed and what am I wearing" mornings.
What's more sad than going to Target to buy Plan B and the new Sam Smith album?
I have a tattoo that says Yolo. You should not have been asking my advice in the first place
IM HUNGOVER AT MOTHERS DAY BRUNCH AND A NUN FROM CHURCH JOINED US
this is gentle reminder #1 not to forget to bring the vibrator when you come
But what we lack in money, we make up for in dry humor and drugs
I blacked out in the cab last night... Cant remember getting in the front door, also i got into bed with my grandma.
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