Emee failed...She used my genitals as a tampon
I'm going to save the lime from my McDonald's salad to use in my Corona later tonight.
I just heard a teenager say to his friend "dats my baby! i was hittin her up on myspace like gurllll. she got me steamin". must have missed the memo its 2005 and we still use myspace.
she kept checking the clock when she was giving me head and at midnight she said she had to stop because she cant eat meat on fridays is that bitch serious
dad just smoked me out. he's yelling at room service for not giving him cookies and milk with his towels...we're both too high to know if thats a legit complaint.
Facebook stalking a girl from Germany is harder then you think.you have to copy and paste all this shit into freetranslations.com then try and piece together an awkward sentence. If only I could put this energy into something productive.
I'm concerned you might be passed out on a random rooftop right now. Not concerned enough to do anything about it. Hope you're alive. Goodnight.
omg. i wish i could describe to you the number of things that were just in my vagina. i feel like i got gangbanged by construction workers.
After you tried speaking to him in whale you asked if you could see his "blow hole." That's how bad it was.
He told me his cum shot melted the paint on his bedroom wall and asked if I want to see it
It's gay softball weekend. Lots of hot gay strangers to go home with.
He tried to get me to go back to his place on the condition that he has 6 cats. I was very tempted but I said no. Hoping to go see the cats tomorrow
we've talked on the toilet we're linked now
she just kept straddling the railing to the stairs and shouting "come on Seabiscuit, lets win this for America."
He has me blocked on facebook.... so I stalked him using my cats fan page.
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