I guess there's a 50 percent chance that it was her that wet my bed.
I'm pretty sure I left my reasoning skills at home last night, and just brought anger and rage with me.
I stood up and a chip flew out of my shirt and landed in the chip dish. I just walked away.
She took her shirt off and was broader than Dwight Howard.
I don't think my ego could take a straight man out-cooking me.
BLOW JOB GIRL IS IN WALMART
Some people actually refer to her as Kaitlyn you know.
i crunched every chip from the dorito bag and poured it in the vase. never again will i have to deal with cool ranch fingers.
1. I feel like Jello 2. The girl i hooked up with last night isn't here and a different girl is lying next to me. 3. I have no clothes on 4. Can guys go on walks of shame?
so he just called his new girlfriend by my name and she was too drunk to even notice how awkward..
Lost another pound. Switching from beer to hard liquor did this body good.
This is going to be another afternoon spent getting drunk in the shower, isn't it?
I think I just got propositioned for sex by the lady behind the counter at dunkin donuts
Chicks, chicks everywhere, and not a drop to drink. Dude, when did real life lesbians get HOT?
Sex aside I am really scared about Syria...
He got me to hold his phone, wallet, keys and pants while he hooked up with another girl.
Randomize
