shes hot in the i'd deny it if anyone asked kinda way
I'm too stoned for this. I'm Canadian.
Heard it's your birthday. I can't send pictures, but go ahead and imagine my balls.
Just heard her singing at the school concert... I am honored my penis was touched by those pipes
I knew we were gonna fuck after she told me she's seen that Porno before
She said i kept moaning her moms name instead of hers
Typical Sunday afternoon purchase of condoms and a helium tank.
Ive only seen a dude masterbate on a train twice, once on the Jtrain and once on the Ftrain... trust me you never wanna see where the subway turns around.
He's going to let me keep his bowl in my car. Does that make us Facebook official?
The amount of guys who just came into the room to give me a high five after hooking up with him was about 5 too many.
My parents woke me up at noon to tell me my maid had found my clothes strewn all over the neighborhood
Please tell me I didn't send you a dick pic in the middle of Peter Pan..
You barfed off the front porch while the elderly neighbors were walking their dog. We had to convince them not to call 911.
Pics or it didn't happen.
I'm in love. Her name is Jamie. She's beautiful. She punched me in the face.
Regardless I WANT TO BE YOUR SEX DISPENSARY. that is like the career I was born for.
Randomize