he conducted the entire waffle house into singing the song Oklahoma. He was wasted.
No more Irish car bombs ever.
i officially have more pictures of his dick than pictures of us together
Does Vicodin go better with white or red wine?
How in the hell did I take a shot of whiskey to the eyeball last night?
You're the only person I know who could blow literal chunks, laugh about it, then proceed to shotgun another beer. Love you champ.
Can you check on Mike in the bathroom. It's been like 20 min.
He's fine. He's just standing at the trash can in line for another beer from the keg. Nbd.
I was so drugged up it was amazing, I felt like a dinosaur "because I enjoyed spinach, and I got apple juice and only dinosaurs get apple juice" according to me the day of, and last night I felt like a rocket ship
I just think his face would be more attractiveif it was framed by my thighs
I need an adult. someone more adult than my current state
Everyone keeps telling me I look so healthy and happy today: the power of the penis people!!
Also, full disclose I puked in a fruit barrel box
Status: mom bitching about grandma not shutting the fuck up, while not shutting the fuck up. Dear Jesus give me strength or more bourbon.
He is saved in her phone as Sir. Mindfuck <3/ vag cleaner of course I need to meet him.
Either I'm getting old or the shit show is playing earlier than it used to...
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