Do you think Patty Mayonase ever went down on Doug?
NEED BACKUP we are in the kitchen arguing about who would win in fight against lil Wayne and snoop dog
She was so drunk that I kept trying to switch out her wine for water. Sort of like Jesus, but in reverse.
he is the anna nicole to my 90 year-old billionaire. i'm grateful that he's fucking me, so i'm buying him shit.
everyone knows he gets back in a week and after that i'm not sleeping around anymore. it's like i have a expiration date.
my dad's beating me at drinking again. No matter what i do I can't win.
we've been doin it since '07. it's like married sex now, were both comfortable so neither of us really tries anymore, we just do it because it's convenient
I've made my dad a martini every night since I was 13.. I got this
I just shit my pants and had a heart attack. Simultaneously. May or may not be related to this game.
as he was bent over the toilet, he turned to me and said "barbarian kyle is much stronger than regular kyle" and then went right back to puking.
Update. A gay dude just told me I'm the most beautiful thing with a vagina he as ever seen. How should I feel about this?
So I got this new job… ever been fucked in a corner office before?
You seem to be avoiding the poop question. How did you poop on your hand?
he was Irish, I had to have sex with him.
PROBABLY?!! And here I was, about to buy you a glow-in-the-dark banana-flavored cock ring... Now I "probably" won't.
Randomize
