I would give away a ton of these clothes but I doubt there are any homeless people who dress as slutty as me
i wish every aspect of life was like a bar. flirt with the cute guy two feet across from you and get whatever you want for free
I don`t remember Saturday, actually
Its ok, i dont remember 2007
I've spent more money on drugs for bonnaroo than my actual ticket. Proudly.
It looks like someone bombed the living room with his and your clothes, bra, packing peanuts, nerf gun and ammo, rc helicopter, leftover chinese food and a leather paddle.
being a senior sucks, I just started embracing my inner slutty college girl, and it's almost time to put her away...for like, ever. and i really like her.
It sounds like I am drunk, but I am not. I just have a concussion.
You cant come. You're a Colorado native who drinks Bud over Coors. Fucking homegrown terrorist.
I woke up at 4 am. Literally pissed. No idea what happened. I could have fucked a cow.
Hey, don't think you remember me but we met last night. I'm conducting a survey this morning its only one question: Have you seen Rob since 1am?
Btw his name is Woody. I must be really drunk to think this is a good situation
She asked me to come on her OkCupid date with her
We're going through the drive-through at mcdonalds while pulling sam behind us in the wheelchair and having them hand him the food. Let me know how this went in the morning
Can't talk, I'm icing "sorry I barfed on your couch" onto a cookie cake
Just woke up beside some twink in a kilt.. how is your sunday going
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