we didnt fuck last night. again. seriously, his place is like where dreams go to die.
I'm giving you permission to use the abortion money to pay for your DUI.
I don't think cute and don't forget to get tested belong in the same text
i do not condone bathtub ky wrestling
I am swimming in semen. He must have been holding it in for a special occasion.
note to self... there IS such a thing as having too many birthday shots...
My mom just said we needed to put weed into our earthquake kit.
The shit I just took was four, very distinct colors. Jager night was a success
We put a ban on pants at an unusually early point in the night.
I'm not sure New Orleans is real. Even the grocery stores sell vodka.
You know it was one hell of a night when you need to use your own thong to wipe cum off your face.
YOU DONT EAT A GIRL OUT AND THEN GO PUKE ASSHOLE
Woke up with a girls naked next to me I had her thong on somehow.
mother daughter bonding time. she's helping me make jello shots.
He may be a manwhore, but he’s a very well endowed manwhore
That’s an important feature when it comes to a manwhore
Randomize
