were having a shit on karen session at work but then she walked in so we used code names instead and she tried to join in like she knew them
theyre doing DJ Khaled impressions again...
bad decision 37: pregaming the antique store
I have your dog in a headlock. Se wants my mushrooms.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Tonight, I'll be cleaning. And by cleaning, I mean drinking booze and spraying everything with Febreze.
It's basically the same plan, only step one gets revised to "look hot enough that he forgets I fucked his roommate"
She rode an inflatable shark down the stairs. Viva shark week.
Wait, you seriously DON'T keep vodka in your backpack??!??!?
Most men with as many freckles as you aren't vagina magnets. You are an exception to your kind.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Yay! Also. When you're coming down eat waffles and touch yourself. You won't regret it.
LET ME HAVE MY JUDGMENT OF OTHER PEOPLE
he sent me a picture of him holding out his pinky so we could pinky promise. i have to fuck him now
Straight up just cock blocked my dad. Also this apple sauce is good.
Is it still sex if there's no nudity, no orgasms, but the neighbors bang on the wall and ask you to stop? I've honestly forgotten.
Omg. I'm living macklemores best life. I have someone's granddads dog, I'm about to have someone's grandmas car. I look incredible.
Randomize