I'm home alone watching The Hills seasons, eating pickles and drinking straight rye. I just googled "how to make friends". Probably not the most pro-active solution. Help.
"Worlds Wildest Videos" should be called "Crazy White People"
I love how all the girls on the plan b commercial wake up alone.. Like me
he screamed my twitter name while we were having sex.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I pulled down his boxers and a 20 dollar bill fell out. I'm telling you, the blowjob fairy EXISTS
I meant to tell you earlier: bad life decision saturday has been moved wednesday this week
He was trying to be aggressive in bed, but in reality, it was like watching a declawed cat try to climb a curtain. They WANT it, they just can't DO it.
He's the kind of drunk guy that would pee in your mouth while you give him head.
You should try cooking mac & cheese naked sometime. It's quite relaxing.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Last night you sang a duet with a gay man posing as a straight man posing as nicole kidman; your life lacks neither color nor texture:)
I got another blow job proposal last night. Skills.
I remember caressing his hands asking him if he moisturized, then i proceeded to put his hands on my face
I wish you could just Google "people I've had sex with" and they would all just come up
I woke up naked and you weren't here. What a relief.
we found her on the beach half naked talking to a palm tree
Which half?
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