these pics are all outta focus - was this what the camera saw? or what your eyes saw?
So i had sex for a couple seconds last night
I just tried to pick my 105-lb puppy up and accidentally fingered its asshole
There are some things we keep to ourselves Brian
so i told my doctor my symptons and she just shook her head at me
I realized today that I should stop thinking so much with my vagina instead of my brain.
Please tell me this doesn't mean another "surprise road trip" where I spend all my money on gas and the SURPRISE destination is the abortion clinic.
But what if I pay for the gas?
Facebook is used to stalk your friends, Twitter is used to stalk celebritie=s, and Myspace is used to stalk underaged girls. Everything else is porn. T=he Internet in a nutshell.
So you had sex with my brother?
It sounds like you dont need me to answer that.
If I ever mention marriage force me to Brazil to do coke and strippers until I die.
I was pissed last night bc this girl didn't want to have sex but offered to reimburse me for the condoms. That just made me upset
I've never felt more disgusting in my life. And I'm including the time I snuggled that homeless woman in the puddle of my whiskey vomit.
I actually bought food at McDonald's as an apology for what I was about to do to their bathroom.
DON'T WEAR PANTS.
I REPEAT.
DO. NOT. WEAR. TROUSERS.
I haven't had to masterbate since I started dating him over a year ago. I don't even know if I remember how and my vagina is calling.
How will you ever teach your dogs to pee outside when the biggest puddle on your bedroom carpet is from you?
I'm still here... I feel so bad wearing your mom's cardigan at a strip club 🙈
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