So how was last night?
Let's just say I danced with the devil
Huh?
I'm going to Hell for sure
that girl last night was a 15
wait she was 15?
no like black jack not sure if you should hit it
I figure if he loans me money i only owe him sex for the rest of the summer before i pay him back, right?
No one goes out in public like that, unless they do anal
I just wished the taco bell drive thru guy a happy cinco de mayo. Who says arizonians hate mexicans?
We can talk tomorrow when we're both alert. My mind is somewhere else right now.
Where's it at?
In your pants.
I'm not sure what happened. But I must have won because I obviously stole two full pitchers of beer from the bar and taped a note on them saying "your welcome"
Someone took a picture of their balls on my phone last night. BEAUTIFUL PACKAGE. I will find this man.
I just spent my entire state tax return on sex toys
Sad fact: I'm doing that thing where I'm bored so I give myself Princess Leia hair and drink alcohol.
She just got on the scale. frowned, got off and took off her pants and then got back on
Only my second night back in town and I already have drunk middle aged women doing the robot around me in a circle.
He is always putting motivational shit on FB. So its like i know hes sad lonely and looking at internet porn. Break up winning
I already tell everyone in my office my bf is at the Naval academy. It slipped one time and I can't go back on it now
You aaa... you ever forget to wipe your ass?
Randomize
