You think ghandi was good in the sack? cuz i sure do.
I'm not gay.
Soooo you want ghandi? is that what your telling me?
If ghandi gives good head...I'm in
Its fine.
Laziness has reached now heights if you too unmotivated to buy pot
Conclusion from last night: Sometimes being classy isn't as fun as making out with a guy on a pooltable in a bar. Happy birthday, Canada.
"Worlds Wildest Videos" should be called "Crazy White People"
it's like iHOP with fire
i forgot beer had calories. that would explain alot.
This whole night would have been avoided if the liquor store had air heads
you were making out with a guy that looked like Fat Albert, I kicked you in the vagina but you didn't stop
The words "me," "sober," and "new years eve" do not go together. Ever.
Friends don't brand friends with cigars. It's not how it works.
i just googled coccaine effects on sexual performance..maybe im dating the wrong guy
Had to snap chat three different people to ask who left the bite mark on my thigh. All three said "Wasn't me". Now I can't wear a bathing suit to my mom's pool.
The twitch Bob Ross stream is the happiest little hangover cure ever.
Gotta love college... Pregamed for my 8:30 flight home this morning and gave the flight attendants all high fives when I got on the plane. Best ride of my life.
I knew the bike rally would be fun when I saw "male pole dancing" on the schedule
Randomize
