Just found out that wake n bake is not one of the 7 habits of highly effective people..
judging by the pasta sauce and dirty pans i spent my blackout being emeril
Walked into a liquor store bleeding. That kind of night.
i admit it was a weird experience, but why regret what once made you cum
He also informed us that it's rude to shove your tit in someone's mouth. Happy Monday.
you picked up the vacuum cleaner at one point and said you we gonna beat the shit out of me with it. that was kinda funny
I'm stoned and just shared 4 cookies with this chicks dog
They're raisins though so they're healthy. No worries.
Looks like I've become the Walter White of my PhD cohort.
Forced to cancel my booty call due to the snowpocalypse. This crosses the line.
It's getting to the point where my ability to get dick pix during the work day is impressing even me. Take that, adulthood!
Just had to stop myself from doing a bump on the Disney bus. The struggle is real.
It got weird the panthers lost and we started throwing wings at one another
I hate that I will forever be known as the girl who puked on the front lawn. That only happened once.
There's a hole in our hallway wall. Don't hate me. I'll fix it. It's only about the size of a beach ball. I promise to never scale walls in our apartment ever again. Don't hate me. I love you.
if they didn't want us to do blow at uni, why would they make textbooks so smooth?
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