What was that guy's name that you dated that wore the leotard?
and that's when the elephants and penises started dancing on the ceiling
Reason #437 to hate Louisiana: Just went to the public bathroom at work. It was so humid the toilet seat was damp and sticky. Either it's the humidity or I sat in somebody's yesterday piss. I choose to believe the humidity.
I hope that the reason I've been psycho on him is that I'm pregnant and not just psycho.
Part in the USA is on your top 25 most played on iTunes. you have NO RIGHT to judge me.
He said "what's the haps". I don't know what the haps are but there goes his chances
I'm pretty sure if an eight year old calls you a whore.. it's true. just saying.
easter eggs filled with ecstasy. it's what jesus would do.
Pretty sure even her dog was surprised when I got that blow job.
i convinced her i need a blow job every morning to wake up because i have a medical condition.
As his dick went in he shouted GOAL at the top of his voice.
So when I eventually, if ever, find someone I'd like to marry, do you think having people fly to africa for a lion king themed wedding is too much?
Apparently it's bring your ugly annoying ass piece of shit slob of a baby day at work
You had a fry stuck to your face... Every five mins you would wake up, take a bite, put it back then fall asleep again...
If I die at work, I want you to have my mustache collection
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