I just realized i haven't had sex in 2009. oh man thats embarrassing.
Looks like an M-80 went off in a lb. of pastrami
I'm going to take the bottles back.. And maybe get an x-ray
Totally just asked Dad if I needed to show the real estate guy my tits so he would let us buy the house. I've really got to work on that filtering thing.
You could give me a blowjob later? :)
I meant do something romantic..
Blowjob In the moonlight?
She's doing shots in her underwear, a fur hat and mittens. I'm never coming home.
The lifeguard told us we had to move Mike before the tide came in when he passed out.
Im down. Even tho your nick name intimidates my vagina.
yeah its nbd she just bit me in the face. be there soon
Realistically anyone can come I don't care it's Boston what do I own boston? No. I just don't want people who are gonna give me "why are you doing that" kinda look when I take birthday shots out of my birthday babe shot glass necklace.
He wouldn't let me leave his house until he made me orgasm once for every year I've been alive. The birthday sex song did not prepare me for this.
It will be like a scavenger hunt.. only we're looking for places to have sex.
I made him watch the first 5 episodes of Game of Thrones before I decided to sleep with him.
Buying a new pipe this morning, and setting up career plans this afternoon. It's called balance
how do do this?
do what? Keep standing? Choose between 2 guys?
keep making boys cry?
Randomize
