so as we were driving to pick up my grandma from old navy she procedes to yell into our open window.. "I'll make ya holla fo a dolla" umm...
I wish the health center treadmills counted beers burned not calories
She better not be too drunk to operate a blowtorch
I usually would've stopped there but I kinda remember opening the bottle of vodka, and we ALL know that's when things go downhill.
So much for not drinking this week after this weekend.. Congratulations. U made it until tuesday.
We got three kegs and a backhoe. Now taking bets on what charges we end up getting arrested for. Will need bail money.
CHAZ BONO WILL BE ON THE NEXT SEASON OF DANCING WITH THE STARS.
Internet Is back!
MY NEWS TRUMPS YOURS.
You take your time. Wallowing in last nights filth is the best way to get over a hangover
Do you know how I hurt my ankle or my shoulder? Or the origin of any of the following mystery bruises: left quad, left wrist, right elbow. Thanks for playing.
Dude next time u fuck on our counters will u please let me know BEFORE I make lunch.
Having the sex-a-thon in the back yard led to some really odd tan lines.
Like handprints on my lower back...
there is a guy passed out on top of me and i don't know what to do. help if you're awake? was anyone anyone expecting someone? maybe he found the wrong room?
Maybe I'm just didn't notice and imagined a different penis as a Freudian coping mechanism?
You gotta hand it to him. 6 hours in a new town and he's already fuck someone, had his ass kick by her bf, and rounded up a posse of people to kick this guys ass.
Why does fireball set life on fire? Your insides, your head, your behavior...
Randomize
