She made me role-play everything from an older prof to a in-patient in need of a medical exam. Yay for cocaine.
just had wine and brownie batter for dinner. Single life is good
I feel like you pissing on my ping pong table isn't something to be proud of.
I caught him with his head in the spinach bag this morning. He was laughing demonically saying, "i love spinach, yes I do."
She pulled a wad of lint out of my bellybutton while she was blowing me. Said she's never seen anything like it. I've never gone soft so fast.
If I get to the point of singing Man of Constant Sorrow then please god let me do it, record it, then cut me off.
Heat not working dressed like an eskimo. A real one with a ski sock on my junk
The batteries in my vibrator died before I could finish. Which is a lot like my sex life lately......
Wtf. So apparently this 5 star establishment doesn't allow strip putt putt in the parking lot. We all just got kicked out of our rooms.
Explain to me how we're not being documented on? A gynecologist I saw two times 8 years ago popped up on my people you may know list on fb. What in the actual fuck?
I've scurried myself in your trunk come find me in the morning
You know you're high when you find yourself sitting on the floor with the refrigerator door open, talking to various foods. Hand gestures and all.
I'm peeing on your house...you up?
Drunk. Send nudes. Just curious.
Woke up with a glow stick in my boobs this morning. Must've dominated Sunday.
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