alone in the kitchen at 4 am eating a hotdog.
We just used hot candle wax from our joint lighting candle to make a bunch of new small ones how stoned are we
We can't have sex anymore. The amount of money I've spent on meds and copays for UTIs is getting ridiculous
At least we kept it together. It's people like him who yell at bushes that give acid a bad name
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just went back to the bar and asked if they found a shoe last night.
after last night my drinking related hospital bracelet collection is up to 13
Most violent shit of my life. New Years resolution of eating better is already kicking me in the face.
So on a scale from 1-10 how gross is it that I used mortuary makeup on my own face?
Oh my god I found my bf's erotica
OH MY GOD HE WROTE THIS EROTICA.
OH MY GOD THIS IS GOOD EROTICA.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
How bad was it?
Stopped drinking Sunday, hungover on Tuesday bad.
I just want somebody to fondle my boobs while I read fanfiction. Is that too much to ask?
he's annoying when i'm sober but vaguely hot when i'm drunk so yes i do have a preference and it goes by the name of vodka
I just want to see you and express my feelings in a drunken manner, but in a sweet way like my english accent.
This is getting exciting. I almost wanna turn off all the lights, get some popcorn, and stare at my phone screen to see if she's going to say yes or not
And on a much sadder note, I'm way to drunk for this right now
Dude whoeverrs house this is has only creeam cheese and beer in the fridge. Thats my kinda diet
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