a/c is broke at work...just took my panties off at my desk and the janitor saw it...might have a date for later. let you know
I've slept with so many tools that you'd think my pussy was Home Depot.
I'm covered in salsa and facewash. I think I'm doing something wrong over here.
Its only tuesday and I need a dd home from work. This is getting too easy.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She is singing the swedish chef song and throwing utensils. I love this place
I think that's the first time I've heard someone say "this is the safest way of doing things" while holding half a gallon of jagermeister
And then he told me he just wanted me to hold his cock while we watched tv...
i know i said i'd always be there for you, but i'm beginning to think that what you call "being there for me" the american judicial system calls reckless endangerment.
every Thursday i draw one of my friends names out of a hat to choose who i will drunkenly text all weekend
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
His balls looked like two miss shaped chicken nuggets
Is it morally wrong to give today's hookup a Krispy Kreme from yesterday's hookup or is it just fat love?
2013: the year of legs covered in hair and pregnancy scares.
She was from Wisconsin, she had great boobs... I mean... It's a dairy state....
I think i just made eye contact with his roommate... while doing reverse cowgirl. Yup i have no shamee
Just remembered someone sprayed perfume in my mouth last night after convincing me it was vodka and that i tried to herd ducks around campus and bring one home.
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