ugh. my friday night is playin' Farmville on my face. time to harvest the blackheads...
Someone shat in the 1st floor west girls hall. Literally SHAT in the hallway
That's what she gets for taking his peeps.
My dick just stopped my iPhone from falling into the toilet.
I'm pregnant just thinking about him.
As long as you're not dating white guys again.
my mom just cut me up lemons and limes so i would have some vitamins with my tequlia
Dave got tied up again. I'm done breaking into girls houses to cut him loose. At least before noon.
My main goal for tomorrow night is to make it back into my own bed
Why is there ANOTHER stolen fire extinguisher in my room? You know that's a felony right...
Hungover, threw up in a cosmetic case in my car this morning. This is real life.
What I've learned from glowsticks: glowing things are not safe to eat
Just to clarify, I'm still tripping balls
On an unrelated note, I've come up with a theory of everything
My fridge is empty and all of my food is in the bathtub. Just.. Why?
I'm pretty sure ignoring the person that just sent you a picture of their boobs is bad nude etiquette.
I CAN SEE SO MANY PENISES. There are so many visible penises here.
Where are you???
Yoga class :(
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