You're in luck. The brownies don't even have butter, just vege oil
Can you tell me we didn't drink from a fish bowl we found in the bathroom last night? I know it would be a lie; I just need to hear it.
He just kept muttering to himself "stabby stabby stabby stabby" while we were boning. I will never be boning him again.
Im beginning to think that if I ever write an autobiography it will have to be mostly fill in the blank.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
the man who designed bathrooms to have toilets within easy puking distance from the shower is my hero
my mom just asked if she should wash your furry handcuffs with the lights or darks
I got pulled into the conversation by "she sleeps with everybody" then "she" involved sleeping with "cocks the size of a viva burrito"
He paid the bartender with money from the tip jar then proceeded to hit on me in front of my date. I love frat dances
She called and said her prescription was refilled. I guess we are dating again.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm taking a shit break of discontent as a personal protest
Well, I just bought plan b with the tips I made from the job that I slept with my manager. So yeah, that's my life. How's yours?
You were more fun when you didn't have morals.
? I'm just sitting watching something borrowed alone, crying in my boxers , feel like I should probably do something
My mom is dancing slutty on the bar I need more drinks to be ok with this
you tried to fight the cop who was busting the party, you said you had a constitutional right to do a keg stand...
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