Dude, my boy c***** and I hooked up with Asian sisters last night in the same room
Then I put on blue by Eiffel 65 and security showed up and yelled at us for being too loud. Also, they stopped fucking because no one can fuck to eiffel 65
Wow that girl who lives a couple houses down is going out wearing butterfly wings a skirt and fishnets
spencer pratt says his family invinted chess
that kid is like the al gore of hollywood.
So tell me more about the cum that came out of your nose
So he asked me last night if I would cheer him on while he masturbated...
Its a sad day when your bush has a better set of hair than you do
I have six drafts of messages to you that just say "blood" and I have no idea where they came from.
Yeah. Rock bottom was him passing out and saying "are you putting a condom on me?" and me covering his mouth and saying shhhhh
Why would you hook up with someone whos known for peeibg in someones mouth
why is there a chinchilla in our apartment, and where did it come from?
question nothing. DON'T QUESTION A FREE CHINCHILLA.
Why does 2015 have to start with so many regrets?
Thank you for listening to my rant about tacos.
Had a dream I was doing scat with Caroline. I need to lay off the cheese at night
last night is slowly putting itself back together. Its one giant slutty puzzle, all the pieces are covered in tequila and shame.
you took my virginity. you can't have my alcohol too.
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