he sat in the bathtub shirtless yelling in gibberish for 40 minutes. funniest. stoner. ever.
Also I got A jello shot for $2!!! It's like the forever 21 of bars
You were shirtless with a cowboy hat in 15 degree weather then u shotgunned a can of mixed vegetable Progresso soup
I think if I could use my boobs as a second pair of hands everything would be ok
He showed up 3 hours late wearing roller skates and acted like nothing was wrong with that.
Received a verbal warning at work for "riding in a trash receptacle, violating professionalism & infection control."
I have a vague memory of you tryin to ride a unicycle through jimmy johns
I'm 50% weirded out and 50% into it
Sure. But we have to be quiet.
Ninja mode activated
I mean, that's eating your cake and fucking it too.
Come over. I have beer, your weird ass vegan pizza, and a raging hard on.
Marry me.
He had to put his grandma's photo away before I tied him to the bed. She doesn't need to see any of that.
Just learned that the cute guy I've been flirting with at the beach this whole time is actually an inmate working in the community instead of being in prison.. My life is unreal
I was drunk in the shower and i decided to shave. Im now bleeding to death
The guy like flippppped out and made me pay $15 for a car wash. I thought I was being extremely courteous by making sure to puke outside the window
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