he was uncircumcised...I HAVE NOT YET REACHED THAT SKILL LEVEL OF DICK
Joey just asked me if I ever got anything stuck in my vag.
was it embarrassing when you had to say yes?
Sarah Palin is going to have a show on the discovery channel...Can I get a moment of silence for knowledge?
btw i have an angry voicemail of you yelling at me to get you a sandwich or die.
My mom would probably be ok with my lifestyle as long as she doesn't see that photo of me doing bong rips in a Jesus costume.
she left with her roommate. or at least i think she did. but i also just thought i ate candy corn but i'm hal convinced it was candle wax.
As the night goes on these shots are getting so much easier. My liver jst needed a warmup lap.
He had "Bad Bitches Only" tattooed above his dick. I don't know his name but I hope I find him again. I also don't feel that I lived up to the challenge.
that man is just a bundle of powerful magic and poor judgment
Sneezing cum all over the table was not the highlight of the family reunion if that tells you anything
You caught me at a bad time. I'm stoned enough that I'm ready to sleep but also not stoned enough that I wanna smoke again but also stoned enough to not wanna drive anywhere
And then I went through the chix filet drive through for breakfast in all my republican post sex glory
My 1st STD. I feel like there should be a cake for this.
Woke up next to a half eaten Philly Cheesesteak. Honestly probably one of the top 3 things I've ever woken up next to.
i think i'm just going to start having sex with his brother, he's much hotter and it would definately be less illegal.
Randomize
