My feet smell like cheese. Makes me hungry.
Sweater Vest, Chin Strap, Beard, sporting a white Beret- Please don't ever let me be THAT guy.
Exactly. I don't do penetration on the first date. Blowjobs however are perfectly acceptable.
I encourage the greeting beej. It determines if the dick is worth keeping around.
my life trainwreck boards at 9:30
she asked me if i wanted her to take her wedding ring off while she was giving me a handjob.
I just watched a girl in the library pull a vodka bottle out of her bag. I think I'm going to give her my number.
It seems to me that once you begin comparing Jesus to hercules and calling him a super pimp you should put the wine away...
They turned the water off again. Brushed my teeth with whats left from those pitchers of mojitos. So hung over i dont even care.
I don't know what's worse: going to the liquor store at 9am or knowing that its open at 9am
The only difference is Iv never super glued straws to your nipples.
There are panties and mini bottles of Fireball in my purse. Except for the broken toe incident, I'd say last night was probably a success.
My whole family just stopped to look at me and aknowledge how fucked up I am.
LET ME HAVE MY JUDGMENT OF OTHER PEOPLE
I hate csi yet I find myself watching a full marathon. I am also eating hotdog buns stuffed with barbecue chips and they are quite tasty
just turned another straight guy gay. Goddamn the church must hate me
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