We are surrounded by old people. Heavens waiting room for sure.
I was hooking up with him in my car, he wouldn't stop with my nipples, I had to literally beat him off of me. He kept groaning too while he was doing it. Sick.
Mommy issues
Have fun fixing the bed from last night Bob Villa.
At least you didn't call me Brittany this time
Some milfs here doing some blow
Dad?
She's like a pop up book from hell.
aparently i pased my english final. I don't even remember taking it.
she wouldn't stop crying, so we sang her to sleep. i'm guessing you will find her in the same position by the toilet in the morning. night.
I fed the cats at 7 am, made her eggs, gave her oral, and now I'm helping her clean and baking her brownies. Cosmos got nothing on me.
Counseling BFF to break up with her BF. We will get that 3-way
I was about to smoke a bunch of weed and lay naked while I cried all day
Looks like breakfast in bed is out the window. She can't get up because I "fucked her into paralysis." My stomach is not happy with my dick right now
Thanks for the hickies, asshole. I make my living as a fitness instructor. It's gonna look reeeeeeal weird if I have to wear a scarf while teaching Zumba all week.
Well he walked in last night, yelled at me for not playing any music and started dancing.
I'm sun burnt so instead of getting drunk and trying to sleep with you, how about we get naked and you scratch my body and rub lotion on me while I rub one out?
I really regret not asking “like a cupcake” when you asked me to eat your ass
Randomize
