Do you realize we just stole 12 dollars worth of quarters each from the office petty cash just to get manicures? New high or New Low?
I want to get so wasted that I make middle aged irish men look like mormon girls
When we woke up, I asked if we could play "what does your name rhyme with".....he said 'bave' thank god it was easy
I just had a librarian tell me that "wikipedia is like sex"
When he expanded on the analogy it actually made sense. "you're going to do it either way, so I'm just going to tell you how to do it safely."
Sarah Palin is going to have a show on the discovery channel...Can I get a moment of silence for knowledge?
Being a responsible DD does not include attempting to coordinate a 4 taxi caravan to bar #3
yes we did fuck in his chapter room. yes it was demeaning. and yes, they probably will discuss it at chapter tonight.
She just ended a sentence with "and he doesn't even mind my herpes..."
im sorry for trying to flush a roll of toilet paper down with my puke. probably not great for your toilet
We haven't said piping hot jizz in awhile... that needs to come back into our conversations
They sleep with other people as long as there is no oral. Logic and reason were thrown out the window a long time ago with them.
Apparently we stole a dog last night. I woke up and it was just staring at me. But we fed it left over KFC for breakfast so it's cool.
Apparently, acid is a good substitute for cash if you don't have any! Who knew?
I fought a guy last night because he said "extra pulp orange juice is the best orange juice"
She looked up and said "I like this." I asked "what do you like?" she said "penis."
Randomize
