LETS GO REDSKINS!
Quit drinking and watching your DVR, it's wednesday.
Sorry I didn't wanna double team his sister. Having whiskey dick and watching you get laid didn't sound appealing
is this the sara with the beer cane?
I was under the impression that I sent actual words. turns out it was a series of letters and question marks on a side note we still had sex
Hey remember that spam cooked in dr pepper we made? 10x better when the dr pepper is rum
The nausea has returned and I can't handle such things to exit my body so violently
All those movies are bullshit, there is no way to run down a line of parked cars, they`re too far apart. my faces hurts so much right now
I fell down the stairs while taking the dog out last night. I was laying there with the dog licking me face and my neighbor just stepped over me
I COULD BREAK CONCRETE WITH MY FOOTBALL ERECTION.
I hate ovaries. They're horrible little sacs of satanic enmity.
That's the most poetic description of female anatomy I've ever heard.
I achieved maximum drunk last night. It was pretty extreme. Woke up on a couch, outside, in a suit
It's cool bro. The video I have of you drunk trying to fix it with the sonic screwdriver was worth it.
He's good looking but he really sounds like kermit the frog, can you imagine how fucking him would sound like?
I ate all your munchie Mac and Cheese cause you left me on the lawn. If you don't want it to happen gain, drag my drunk ass inside next time
It was a crazy night: tears were shed, blood was spewed, and bottles were emptied.
Randomize
