yeah so this exboyfriend of yours reckons you're still together and he punched me in the face cos i slept with you last week. you might wanna have a word with him or at a minimum change your facebook status.
just found out my sister was breast fed and i was not...pretty upset about that.
i just hate vaginas for liking penis's insside them
I am swimming in semen. He must have been holding it in for a special occasion.
I'm trying to decide if I want to bring home my 'beer champion' trophy or my chem books.
I couldn't tell if those girls from the bar were lesbians or just awesome
My overnight senior got drunk and hooked up with Kaylee on Sunday. I checked Facebook and he already put down his deposit for next year. This school should pay me a commission.
I should start an etsy shop with all the jewelry and clothes women leave at my house
I feel like I was eaten by a coyote, then shit over a cliff...
I knew no one else would have gone along with it since it's morally wrong and probably illegal. You said, "Yes. And let's add fireworks."
I'm pretty sure I just need an IV drip of Plan B at this point...
Not my type, but the penis looks fun.
He sent me a pic stitch collage of all the tit pics I had sexted him this month. It was so sweet!
They wouldn't let me on the bull because I couldn't even sign my own name... She let me try 3 times...
His wife just cheated on him for the third time. I'm his first extra-marital fling, that makes it ok, right? You know to keep karma balanced in the universe
Your logic is flawless...
Randomize
