on a scale of one to ten, how awkward would it i told him i had to go change my tampon and then left?
11
it was 5AM and you were field goal kicking solo cups into the sink
Just heard a guy on the phone saying " ya ill buy the eight ball " then came to my register to ask what asile the sugar substitute is on.
i'm too drunk to leave my room. poked my head out like a turtle and everyone knew i wasn't sober. i like it better in my nonjudgmental turtle shell anyway.
It's my vagina- remember its magical and yes I just did mini spirit fingers
It was like giving head to a cactus.
He ate shrooms at 9:30, said, "see you later," and left. I am alone on New Years.
I asked her if she could eat some Doritos so when we made out it would taste awesome
It was the highest I'd ever been. I felt like a blob. A blob eating a burrito.
YOU LEFT MY FUCKING BRA OUTSIDE OF YOUR HOUSE AND NEVER TEXTED ME.
I downloaded the presidential playlists for offline listening. And Obama made a night one so we have presidential approved fuck jamzzzzz. Thanks Obama!
It's 7am. I'm making pizza & watching the Matrix. I will not be bothered.
To answer your next question, yes, I'm drunk.
I'm good. But Nutella doesn't taste as good as it used to.
I hate her so much I want to fuck her boyfriend.
It's magical, I'm just dancing. It's like prom but by myself and with less clothes.
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