Admittedly I was a little ambitious with some of the positions but you walked in during the worst of it.
you made pancakes with beer, you said they were good. then you threw up 15 minutes later
So the weirdest part of it all was he whispered in my ear "can i eat you out on your tredmill?" I dont find him attractive at all anymore
he said the way to his heart was through his stomach, i told him if he wanted to eat my food he had to eat my kitty
smooth operator
I was told to ask you about memoirs of a geisha.
BIGGER SANDWIJH COME NIW OR DIE
of course! give me a few hours to recover from chugging a 4loko out of a frisbee, and it will be rage time yet again
I deem her datable let the dance of attraction commence
I think we need to have a day of drinking in classes. I know we don't share any, but sacrifices need to be made.
You can't be friends with my side piece. Conflict of interest.
My pants zipper is stuck halfway down. I have to interview an intern later. This day is gonna be amazing,
So now I'm lying here in bed taking notes from Teen Mom... I fucked up
I'm 2 weeks in to my all dick and carb diet and so far I've lost 2lbs.
Wrong Cuomo but I had a dream last night in which I was very sexually attracted to Chris
I was so high last night that at one point I kept licking his neck saying he tasted like soap and truffles.
Randomize