I hate all girls vehemently.
please tell me if i'm home and in my bed
negative
come find me please
you can't get genital warts from dogs can you?
I was about to go down on her and her dong flopped out and hit me in the chin. This may have a Nam like post-traumatic-stress-disorder effect on me.
there was a guy here who managed to get his head stuck in a fishbowl. no, I don't fuckin know how
I twisted my ankle last night doing a super high five with 3 inch heels on.
he got instantly turned off in the middle of a blowjob when he heard the news "twilight beat the blockbuster record of batman"
he didn't want to fuck because he was too busy skateboarding. what are we 12? I'm too old for this shit.
Last time I saw him the sun was coming up and he was asleep in the student wellness parking lot. For some reason people were peeing on him.
Nothing says happy baby shower like showing up still kinda drunk from last night with an open tall boy in one hand and fries in the other.
So the old dude that tried to fight me is definitely Katie's dad. And the pot cookie's kicking in. Shit is getting weird.
It feels like a bunch of leprechauns are using my brain as a soccer ball
I'm making a date with someone on Playstation Home. That's how my sex life is going right now.
Nobody will take a lit match to your nipple without warning you this time. Pinky swear.
He told me was "pretty like the wife in some movie where the husband is a cheater." I think I'm gonna fuck him.
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