oh i have no idea about his personality. i imagine it's the same as it was- except now combined with a receding hairline and a beer gut
She was blacklisted from the Uhaul center...what the fuck do you have to do to get blacklisted from a Uhaul center
Saw a guy pass out and hit his head on a urinal. Laughing too hard to help him up
Whatever you gave me is making me lactate
as much as i want to say no i cant cause i need the trophy wife training
Step one go to argentina step two fuck bitches it's a simple plan really
I'll just be here. Naked. Eating tots and jello like a muh fuggin G
We can see it once so I can see the whole movie, then I'll go see it with him so I know when the boring parts are and I can have sex with him during those parts
Trustme, don't ever look up when you're giving road head. It's awkward.
We need to get stoned and watch Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles 2. This has become a priority. Schedule accordingly.
I don't care that you had sex on my bed. I care that you used my lollipop condom. I was saving that for a special occasion
It was a special occasion. Your best friend had crazy awesome sex on your bed. Thank you
Woke up in a cemetery. Puked in front a funeral ceremony that was going on.
They say find what you're good at... Evidently that's showing up late for everything, drinking, and eating cheese for me.
You were in the girls bathroom yelling at some random chick because you thought she stole all the urinals. That's why you were kicked out.
I watched one of the videos of you hanging from the rafters, and it is both violent and sexual in nature.
Randomize
