Hey I found your number in my phone i dont remember how we met this is richard btw
strange i dont have your number must have been a drunk thing
could be more
absolutely not
question: masturbation: how much is too much? I think i'm about to tip toe a fine line
i think i just put your shirt on , but i don't remember . my body can't decide if it wants to move in slow motion or fast forward
I managed to convince him it was his fault I cheated on him...he spent the last 40 minutes going down on me. I feel legendary.
He introduced himself to me as "the gayest gay who ever gayed." I like him already.
If you can't find your cat in the morning it's cause i put him in the laundry basket and then put the laundry basket in the shower.
how did i get to the car and why are my shoes broken
im sure shes a lovely person but i cant be friends with someone that doesnt drink. its just not right.
so i guess now we know you can get away with peeing mere feet from the Capitol if you shout IM PREGNANT at the guards
Just successfully invited my mom to a drag show. If that doesnt say "im gay" then idk what will.
Apparently drunk me thought it was a good idea to buy $100 worth of band aids and stick them all over everything in the apartment.
i woke up inside a girl that i promised i would take on a date to Chili's
I think i'm the first person to get kicked out of a club while completely sober. Come outside please!!
We will let tequila do the talkin this weekend
Omg in one week, two guys with their own names tattooed on their bodies had their tongues in my mouth. Self loathing shall commence now.
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