i think the semi hot bartender might actually be a man in drag..on a similar note, what are you drinking?
drinking warm bud heavies i found in the garage and googling how to tell the gosselin kids apart.
I was in a threesome last night that turned into a violent domestic dispute with damage to a hotel. Wish you were there!
He just kept yelling woof and then threw money all over me...
We had a long talk in which he told me he respects me more than any other girl. 30 minutes later, I got a facial.
My goal for tonight: make tomorrow as awkward as humanly possible.
my stepmom is let-the-dog-eat-out-of-her-mouth drunk. oh my god.
She gave such good road head it was turned into side-of-the-road head for everyone's safety
you'll be horrified to know he's visiting next weekend
You two are a rollercoaster of sex and silence.
He held the beaver pelt from the fireplace over my crotch and asked his friend "she look familiar now?", he then remembered my name.
those kids just got delivered to the party by the pizza guy
He stood me up and then his cat died. I feel like this is Gods way of saying he's on my side, even after the tequila fiasco.
You thanked me for a delicious cock and tacos...
He was so aggressive it felt like he was giving my boob a root cannal
I puked in the back of my mom's new car because I had too much to drink at Chilis. I think I just hit rock bottom.
Randomize
