he used the word "rubber" i just couldn't do it after that.
I hope whoever gets these locks of love doesn't have a drug test anytime soon
Woke up on the floor with my glow stick in one hand & dollar bills in the other. Good. Morning.
If letting him bang me while i'm wearing reindeer antlers and a painted red nose isn't the christmas spirit, I dont know what is
I mostly enjoyed dancing with him because his boner was scratching my bug bites.
How do you think the people in my class would react if I ripped all my clothes off and jumped on him right now?
IT WAS SO BIG. I FORGOT GOD MADE THEM LIKE THIS.
It's like god made him fantastic at oral to make up for what his mouth does the rest of the time.
I think it really helped to be hungover at accepted students day. it gave me a good feel for how it would be everyday if I go there.
why do all the dudes in this porno look like billy ray cyrus
Let's celebrate that I used a condom
Whoever was doing lines off my iPad is a dick. Also bring Gatorade, for I hunger
For Who flesh?
I'm at the back whiskey bar with a 7 and 7 in a winnie the pooh costume. Come find me.
I didn't have any lime for my chaser.. so after my shot I ate a handful of lime flavored chips. Didn't work so great.
In the past year, I've fucked 3 Dave's and you've fucked 2 Dave's. That's a lot of Dave's in our vaginas.
We need to start a soap opera called the Dave's of Our Lives.
Randomize
