After last night, I could never be a politician.
Awesome. Ask her out.
Nope. She's got a detail of ed hardy security around her.
remember when you told me, jokingly, to not get jizz on your shirt that i borrowed last night?
Apparently when you order 'bottomless fries' at red robin that doesnt mean you can go around to every table and eat all the fries you want off other peoples plates.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
does drinking everclear count as brushing your teeth? because i think they are sterilized
I just used dish soap as body wash. I smell like a dishwasher exploded. isn't the end of the semester fun?
Why is there an appointment in my calandar called "get the fuck to the bus" at 3 am june 19th?
And dont tell me its his job to cockblock me just because he's my boyfriend.
She took the fish and put it in the hot tub, then turned on the jets. She said she was training it for the Olympics.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I haven't received a dick pic from him lately. He's not even my boyfriend and I'm concerned. I hope he's alright.
I masterbated to the rocky theme song. I'm pretty sure that just beat any sex experience I've ever had.
You haven't lived until you've thrown up naked in a hotel room in Fargo while holding your breasts so they don't touch the toilet bowl.
Omg there's puke under my pillow. Clearly I puked and tried to hide it. From myself. \n
I was told I was gorgeous and a whore by the drag queens. My night is complete.
She then told me, and I quote "I want to send you nudes just to see how you'd react."
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