i don't mind that he's uncut. i like it! it's like a little sweater!
a cock doensn't need a sweater! especially a skin sweater! wtf.
That's like some buffalo bill hannibal lector shit.
So guy #2, the dancer, is programmed into my phone under the name H.uy. His number- 11 digits. I should have stopped drinking.
i think you ate grass..but you refused to open your mouth so we could see..
They're here. One showed up as a slutty Crayola, and I think the other came as The Fat Friend.
The slutty girl scout law, revised for halloween 10: on my honor i will try, to serve my vagina and my shot glass. To hold back friends hair at all voming moments and to live by the sluttly girl scout law.
Chances are I'll be there for your wedding. Camelbaks filled with jack and coke are appropriate attire, right?
I picked the lock on the bathroom door and sang him a song while he pooped. Why is he mad?
You got the whole drunk bus to sing, "In The Jungle" while conducting with your glowsticks.
Hey, who is this? Sorry, you're in my phone as "you better remember".
It's just not a Friday night unless I'm getting propositioned by a guy in a wheelchair via Facebook messenger...
Yes... I'll kill two birds with one crazy ecstacy filled night.
Don't worry, I'm not gonna try making you Eskimo sisters with your mom
Today, this cop risk his life to save me from a sink hole but all I could do is laugh, I was so stoned
u would mumble something and then get unnecessarily loud and say random shit like 'id fuck the shit out of taylor hanson right now'
I don't remember anything beyond the drinking game but I woke up in my own pee this morning so I'm just gonna go out on a limb and say I overdid it.
Randomize
