i used the pictures of vaginas in your biology book to jack off.
if i were reduced to my simplest elements, i would be jizz and glitter.
all i care about is the story behind my toaster ending up in the microwave
okay, this game isn't funny anymore. tell us where all the forks are.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I don't go on dates. I watch tv and play with dicks. dinner is a situation.
I just broke a sweat shaving my own vagina. Something has got to change.
I mean two cocks this time. Trust me, I'm not gonna pull the same stunts as last time in this situation
We had fun with our Indiana Jones role-playing until I whipped myself in the dick with my belt.
Finals week...the biggest cock block since your brother threatened me with a beer bottle at the bar.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
There was another blizzard last night and at one point I was drinking 3 beers at once. Driving home didn't seem like a wise option
Is it too early in the day to be getting dressed for the strip club?
Take a shit and have a hit. It's the Sunday Funday Rule.
Soooooo I may or may not have accidentally been a catalyst in a destroyed marriage.
He shampooed and conditioned his pubes but can't manscape for shit.
Where am I? And why the fuck did you leave me here?
Relax. I left you somewhere safe plus you have all my weed so you know I will come back for you.
Randomize